CONTENTS

About This Course

Table of Contents

1. Introduction to the Issues
2. Understanding Alcohol Abuse
3. Understanding Violence Against Women
4. Alcohol and Domestic Violence
5. Alcohol, Sexual Assault, and Rape
6. Prevention and Early Intervention
7. Screening and Assessment
8. Diagnosis and Treatment
9. Legal and Ethical Issues

Supplements
Fact Sheets
Videos
Resources

Silence Hurts
Alcohol Abuse and Violence Against Women

Effects of Drinking and Family Abuse on Children

Some abused women do not realize the effect that violence and drinking have on their children. They might say, "We never fought in front of our son" or "My daughter was in her room at the time, so she wouldn't know about it."

Partners of alcoholics and abusers often minimize the impact of drinking and violence on the family. Denial dominates the family. They learn not to feel, not to trust, and not to talk. In addition, the children may see alcohol and violence as part of life and adopt similar behaviors later in life.

Alcoholism, when coupled with violence, amplifies the need for denial and creates an even greater sense of hopelessness for family members.⁴⁶ Unfortunately, children at very young ages witness the violence and drinking and end up suffering the repercussions. Many become victims of abuse themselves. A national survey of more than 2,000 American families showed that between 45 and 70 percent of children exposed to domestic violence are victims of physical abuse.⁴⁷

Infants exposed to violence also suffer. They may not develop critical attachments to their parents. They may become "failure to thrive" babies.⁴⁸ In extreme cases, they may be injured or killed if their mother is holding them when the abuser is violent. When substance abuse is present, mothers are not as attentive to their babies and might neglect their basic needs for food, clothing, and safety.

Children exposed to violence can exhibit somatic complaints such as stomachaches, headaches, or just not feeling well. They may also experience:

• Loss of appetite or change in appetite
• Sleep disturbances such as nightmares or restlessness
• School problems, such as skipping school, grades dropping, attention problems
• Withdrawal or increasing isolation
• Clinging to mother or siblings
• Fear of the dark or of strangers
• Increased violent behaviors such as kicking, scratching, fighting
• Regression, such as bedwetting, wanting a bottle, thumb sucking
• Temper tantrums, whining, and inappropriate responses to discipline
• Role reversal, such as parenting the mother
• Drug or alcohol use by teenagers
• Depression and suicidal thoughts (middle and high school children) ^49,50

Whatever the behavior, children (from grade school and up) need to be able to talk to someone whom they can trust. The professional therapist or counselor needs to convince them that it is normal to feel the guilt and shame felt by all children who are raised in a violent home. Young children who have not mastered talking can still benefit from play therapy with a trained professional.